Normalcy

Cubby's first four weeks have gone by fast. And, to be honest, they've been a much better first-four-weeks than the first four weeks I had with Buddy.

We didn't know Buddy had Williams syndrome until he was diagnosed at 9 months. But during those 9 months, there was a nagging thought in the back of my mind, "Surely this can't be normal." His feeding difficulties, his SVAS, his sleeping difficulties, his weight-gain problems, his kidney problems, the way he didn't seem to be "getting it," the constant crying, the colic that lasted way beyond when it was supposed to end . . . .

Taken one-by-one, a mother might think, "Ah well, that's just the way he is." But when it's one thing on top of another, it's difficult not to think, "What is wrong with my child?"

I once asked Huband if he thought I was out of it during the first weeks of Kieran's life. "Weeks?" said he. "Try months." I suppose he's right. Lack of sleep does tend to mess with one's mind and personality. Kieran didn't sleep longer than 2-3 hours at a time until he was about six months. He didn't sleep through the night until he was 15 months. And he still doesn't sleep longer than 8-10 hours at night (but I'm not complaining on that point--I'm just glad he's sleeping!).

Until we got Buddy's diagnosis and I realized that what we were experiencing really wasn't normal, I had a difficult time understanding how anyone would want--or could handle--more than one child.

My prayer during the pregnancy with Cubby was, "Please, Lord, just let him sleep." I can handle life much better when I'm not sleep deprived. The Lord graciously heard my prayer and gave us Cubby. From the beginning, Cubby has given me more than just an hour of sleep at a time. And last night, he slept for five hours at one time.

Cubby is also eating well and gaining weight. And I don't have that "surely this isn't normal" thought continually running through my head.

I hope, for the sake of mothers everywhere, that this is more on the normal end of the spectrum. And I hope, for my sake, that the lengthening of nighttime sleep continues.